Inspiration...or lack of....

Inspiration has totally eluded me in the past weeks. Hence why I posted this picture. It was taken in Jasper at the beginning of August. Jasper itself inspires me. I always have a good time when I go there.

But on to other uninspiring forces. I guess this is just a portal for my complaining today. Once again I have a paper to write for tomorrow and I've been thinking constantly about what I want to write about. I am totally at a lack for ideas. I even tried scrapbooking last night in an effort to get some creative juices flowing. I got 2 pages done in the span of 5 hours. I mostly just stared. It was totally unsatisfying. I hate it when I get into these moods where I want to do something, I have to create or express, but when it comes down to executing the actual creation, I've got nothing! Now I look out the window while attempting to research this paper, and I see the sun and people out walking, and I want to be out there too. But I have a paper to write. And I refuse to leave it until tomorrow morning.

Down right depressive.

Lightning strikes....

I'm sitting here trying to do homework, and I see a flash of light in the window. It's blue light, very "electrical" in appearance and feeling. Thunder follows. I'm alone in this house and there are only 2 lights on, the one in the office (where I am) and one in the kitchen. Needless to say, it's kind of creepy. Almost 9 o'clock.

Apparently we're to get rain for the next 4 days. That makes walking to school somewhat discouraging. Now I'll actually have to spend money on public transportation as well as on my car.

I'm trying to come to grips with my inability to commit to new changes in my life. Now that statement sounds life-altering. But really, it's not. I've set it upon myself to live up to the goals that I've set for myself. Now, these goals are not huge, heart-stopping, or impossible. These are small goals. For instance.
1. To get myself to bed by 10:oo pm
Rationale: I must get up around 5:00- 5:15 am in order to get myself to school on time. Therefore to do so and do so without yawning constantly, I must get some half decent sleep. It's currently 9:00pm. I really don't want to go to bed in 1/2 an hour.

2. To attempt at least 2 hours of homework per night and start assignments early so I'm not doing the late night rush the night before the assignment is due. Plus I want to do as little homework on the weekends as possible.
Rationale: I would like to incorporate a life into my school life and NOT feel guilty about it.

Now, these rationales sound great. Theoretically they should provide great motivation towards meeting these goals every week. Then why are these goals so friggin difficult to meet???

Life just is not as simple as answering this specific question.